I grew up in a town of sameness. I didn’t know that's what it was until the age of 18 when I went off to college. I didn’t know that our town had so much sameness because at that time, I saw how differently people handled the God part of their lives. There were the Presbyterians, the Baptists, the Methodists, the Episcopalians, the Catholics, and just 5 houses down the street were the Seventh-Day-Adventists. The Presbyterians were the people who went to the big white church with columns on Broad St. This was the church that my grandparents joined. Grandma had always been a Baptist because her father was a Man of God and a Baptist Minister in Chicago. Grandpa was born a Methodist but became a Baptist to marry my Grandma. If you knew them and what a religious life they led, you would be surprised at how they chose their church/religion. When they moved to Hastings in their thirties with their three kids, they gave each church a try-out based on the choir. The Presbyterian choir won, and they became lifelong members. My grandparents seemed to have leanings of the Baptists from what I understood. They did not drink alcohol except for an occasional nip of peppermint schnapps, they read the bible daily, and so on. I got to go to their church one time. It was all white with red carpeting and red cushions. We mostly sang, and there were no Gods that I could see. It was nothing like the dark somber church that I went to, filled with statues and the big eye looking down.
I didn’t know any Baptists except for what spilled over from my Grandma. The Methodists seemed like the happening group. All the kids who went to church were Methodists. They had a cool youth group that made Christmas candy and they all found God in their weekly services. We never mentioned the Seventh-Day-Adventists. Someone in my class was an Episcopalian, and I got to go to her church once. It was dark and mysterious and her Dad was the Reverend! I could not understand that at all because we were Catholics. Catholic priests don’t marry and once you are born a Catholic, you don’t change for a better choir. We didn’t read the Bible and we didn’t have a youth group, we either went to Catholic school or went to catechism. You could become a Catholic, and so my Methodist dad became a Catholic, to marry my mom. There was no mall, no theater in my town of 5000 people. We lived up from the fairgrounds and there were horse races and hog sales. Maybe this is why the different church activities and customs seemed like so much variety in life. I learned that my town was built on sameness when I was ready to go to college. I wanted to go to the University of Michigan in 1977 which was considered the tail end of the hippie era. The town was in an uproar. I was told that if I went to U of M, I would become a vegetarian, a lesbian, a communist. I would eat yogurt. I might stop shaving my legs and braid my armpit hair. There would be Jewish and Black students. I didn’t know what some of these things even meant, but all of these possibilities said that the world must be different than the sameness of my town. It sounded terrifying and amazing! As a child, church occupied much of my thoughts and was a big part of our play. First we would make the Communion hosts, taking white bread and a bottle cap. We cut out little round shapes, then took a rolling pin and rolled them flat. We would put the hosts on a plate and begin Mass. Sue always got to be the priest. In my world, the oldest usually got the privilege of the best role, and Sue was the oldest. But I also never had the courage to push for being the priest. Priests were a role for men only and I was clearly not a man. At that time, girls were not allowed to be altar girls and I didn’t like pretending. We would play church. The priest would hand out the hosts. We’d stick out our tongues and say ahhh, and go back to our pew to pray. As a freshman at U of M I met a woman who was doing her masters studying Taoism. When she said the word Taoism, it was if I both fully understood what Taoism was but had also never heard the word before. That a woman could study this exotic religion/philosophy for two years intrigued me. I so much wanted a religion where women counted. I took a world religion class which rocked my world sideways, backwards and upside down. The possibility that not everyone in the world believed in original sin resonated deeply within me. In each religion we studied, I kept looking for my bottom line, were women allowed in the hierarchy and what was the take on original sin? In studying Jainism, Zoroastrianism, and Christianity I looked; were women allowed to perform rituals? Could women become enlightened? Could women become priests? Finally when we studied Buddhism, I found that there was mention of one woman who became enlightened, one bodhisattva who was born in a female body. For many years this knowledge sustained me, that in Buddhism there was the possibility of liberation, freedom, and enlightenment for me. When I met Swamiji in 2006, it was still very much an issue for me. What are the roles of a woman in Hinduism? Can women attain enlightenment? Swamiji has spoken on this many times and has dispelled many myths regarding the role of women in Hinduism, and is showing the world what Hinduism has to offer, including enlightenment for all. In the Jayanthi message for 2016, Swamiji made the statement, “This year is dedicated for Shuddhaadvaita Shaivam - Living Advaita, the oneness. By this act, we will bring spiritual legitimacy to Sanatana Hindu Dharma. It is time - we have a right to exist and our existence is good for humanity!” For me, the question itself has melted. Deep inside, the consciousness of who I am, who I have been, is neither male nor female, Catholic, Buddhist or Hindu. As a vehicle, and process, Swamiji is showing that Hinduism can help the most people on the planet at this time. Being led on an inner awakening towards Swamiji and Hinduism has dissolved my questions as I recognize my enlightenment, my sameness, my oneness. Comments are closed.
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April 2021
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